登陆注册
4718400000008

第8章 PUBLIC LIFE OF MR. TULRUMBLE - ONCE MAYOR OF MUDFO

As to old Nicholas, he kept his word, and having had six weeks of public life, never tried it any more. He went to sleep in the town-hall at the very next meeting; and, in full proof of his sincerity, has requested us to write this faithful narrative. We wish it could have the effect of reminding the Tulrumbles of another sphere, that puffed-up conceit is not dignity, and that snarling at the little pleasures they were once glad to enjoy, because they would rather forget the times when they were of lower station, renders them objects of contempt and ridicule.

This is the first time we have published any of our gleanings from this particular source. Perhaps, at some future period, we may venture to open the chronicles of Mudfog.

第一章FULL REPORT OF THE FIRST MEETING OF THE MUDFOG ASSOCIATIONFOR THE ADVANCEMENT OF EVERYTHING

We have made the most unparalleled and extraordinary exertions to place before our readers a complete and accurate account of the proceedings at the late grand meeting of the Mudfog Association, holden in the town of Mudfog; it affords us great happiness to lay the result before them, in the shape of various communications received from our able, talented, and graphic correspondent, expressly sent down for the purpose, who has immortalized us, himself, Mudfog, and the association, all at one and the same time.

We have been, indeed, for some days unable to determine who will transmit the greatest name to posterity; ourselves, who sent our correspondent down; our correspondent, who wrote an account of the matter; or the association, who gave our correspondent something to write about. We rather incline to the opinion that we are the greatest man of the party, inasmuch as the notion of an exclusive and authentic report originated with us; this may be prejudice: it may arise from a prepossession on our part in our own favour. Be it so. We have no doubt that every gentleman concerned in this mighty assemblage is troubled with the same complaint in a greater or less degree; and it is a consolation to us to know that we have at least this feeling in common with the great scientific stars, the brilliant and extraordinary luminaries, whose speculations we record.

We give our correspondent's letters in the order in which they reached us. Any attempt at amalgamating them into one beautiful whole, would only destroy that glowing tone, that dash of wildness, and rich vein of picturesque interest, which pervade them throughout.

'MUDFOG, MONDAY NIGHT, SEVEN O'CLOCK.

'We are in a state of great excitement here. Nothing is spoken of, but the approaching meeting of the association. The inn-doors are thronged with waiters anxiously looking for the expected arrivals;and the numerous bills which are wafered up in the windows of private houses, intimating that there are beds to let within, give the streets a very animated and cheerful appearance, the wafers being of a great variety of colours, and the monotony of printed inscriptions being relieved by every possible size and style of hand-writing. It is confidently rumoured that Professors Snore, Doze, and Wheezy have engaged three beds and a sitting-room at the Pig and Tinder-box. I give you the rumour as it has reached me;but I cannot, as yet, vouch for its accuracy. The moment I have been enabled to obtain any certain information upon this interesting point, you may depend upon receiving it.'

'HALF-PAST SEVEN.

I have just returned from a personal interview with the landlord of the Pig and Tinder-box. He speaks confidently of the probability of Professors Snore, Doze, and Wheezy taking up their residence at his house during the sitting of the association, but denies that the beds have been yet engaged; in which representation he is confirmed by the chambermaid - a girl of artless manners, and interesting appearance. The boots denies that it is at all likely that Professors Snore, Doze, and Wheezy will put up here; but Ihave reason to believe that this man has been suborned by the proprietor of the Original Pig, which is the opposition hotel.

Amidst such conflicting testimony it is difficult to arrive at the real truth; but you may depend upon receiving authentic information upon this point the moment the fact is ascertained. The excitement still continues. A boy fell through the window of the pastrycook's shop at the corner of the High-street about half an hour ago, which has occasioned much confusion. The general impression is, that it was an accident. Pray heaven it may prove so!'

'TUESDAY, NOON.

'At an early hour this morning the bells of all the churches struck seven o'clock; the effect of which, in the present lively state of the town, was extremely singular. While I was at breakfast, a yellow gig, drawn by a dark grey horse, with a patch of white over his right eyelid, proceeded at a rapid pace in the direction of the Original Pig stables; it is currently reported that this gentleman has arrived here for the purpose of attending the association, and, from what I have heard, I consider it extremely probable, although nothing decisive is yet known regarding him. You may conceive the anxiety with which we are all looking forward to the arrival of the four o'clock coach this afternoon.

'Notwithstanding the excited state of the populace, no outrage has yet been committed, owing to the admirable discipline and discretion of the police, who are nowhere to be seen. A barrel-organ is playing opposite my window, and groups of people, offering fish and vegetables for sale, parade the streets. With these exceptions everything is quiet, and I trust will continue so.'

'FIVE O'CLOCK.

同类推荐
  • 上清洞玄明灯上经

    上清洞玄明灯上经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • THE RETURN OF THE NATIVE

    THE RETURN OF THE NATIVE

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 蔗庵范禅师语录

    蔗庵范禅师语录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • Prester John

    Prester John

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 宣和乙巳奉使金国行程录

    宣和乙巳奉使金国行程录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 半卷宫沙

    半卷宫沙

    “我叫邵韵宅,万万没想到本来一心想整容结果他妈的穿越了,又万万没想到在第二章就碰上了我的真命天子也就是本书的男主……妈蛋?!结果你告诉我这不是男主?老娘恋爱都谈了好几章了你告诉我我要嫁给男二??行行行,反正都是帅哥跟谁谈都是谈……我擦嘞?!你告诉我男二爱的真爱不是我?大姐男二不都是大暖男为了女主出生入死这个咋回事?为啥是个二楞?行吧,反正我长得好看我牛逼我攻略他……日哦,为什么这么这本说好的喜剧小说怎么慢慢走向了扯淡的论理意难忘……万万没想到啊万万没想到!!现在辞职女主还来得及吗?在线等,挺急的!”
  • 中国式富人的99条人生经验

    中国式富人的99条人生经验

    授之以鱼,不如授之以渔,无限的生财之道才是无价之宝,汇聚顶级商业精英创富智慧,指引普通老百姓通往致富之路。开启富人的财富密码,打通我们的致富之路。
  • 太清调气经

    太清调气经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 末世甜宠:大佬罩我超强的

    末世甜宠:大佬罩我超强的

    “老大,我臣服你的心,青天可鉴,绝对对你没有非分之想。你千万不想要相信外面的谣言!我绝对是你最忠诚的女小弟!”谣言纷起,在末世这个大熔炉。杜凉凉一心只想抱紧老大的金大腿,在末世里身藏一个超市系统,希望不愁吃,不愁穿,安安稳稳活到老,不被切片做研究。然而,不知道从什么时候,谣言四起,弄得她小心肝狂跳。“嗯,我知道你对我没有非分之想,臣服之心青天可鉴!”老大如是说道。杜凉凉眼睛放光,连忙点头。小心肝儿刚放到肚子,就听到自己老大继续说道。“可是凉凉,我对你有非分之想,不想要你的臣服之心,而是要你的爱恋之心了怎么办?”
  • 慕少,请你消停点

    慕少,请你消停点

    本想躲避催婚的她和陌生男人签订了形婚合同,然而那男人却渐渐对她开启狂撩模式。“秦书香,去看看医生,脑子不太好。”某男勾唇一笑,把某女所有的脏话都咽进了嘴里。--情节虚构,请勿模仿
  • 万里星辰皆是你

    万里星辰皆是你

    (新书:酸酸的纪少也想要甜甜的恋爱已发布)前世早已注定的情缘,逃不掉,放不开。A市的人都知道:A市帝少陆临手段残暴,狠起来六亲不认,对女人提不起兴趣,傲娇高冷。遇见女主之后,他过关斩将扑美人,实力宠妻打白莲。某记者A:陆总,听说陆太太昨夜翻墙逃跑了?陆总:逃?不存在的,我和她一起的。某记者B:陆总,听您的姐姐爆料说,昨夜,您睡的书房,请问是您和太太之间出现了问题吗?陆总:我太太和我一起睡的书房,体验一下不行?……本文十分宠,宠死人不偿命。
  • 一日一省大全集(超值金版)

    一日一省大全集(超值金版)

    《一日一省大全集(超值金版)》撷取了大师先哲的智慧,篇篇蕴含振聋发聩、发人深省的生活真理,促使你扪心自省,将你思想中浅薄、浮躁、消沉、自满、狂傲等污垢涤荡干净,让你在反思中重新认识自己,从反思中获取前进的力量。把“省”当成每日的功课,让它深植在你的心里,你就能理清生命的脉络,并让你的人生之路变得更加清晰、明了。心量有多大,事业就有多大;心能容多少,成就就有多少。
  • 郁达夫谈旅行

    郁达夫谈旅行

    《郁达夫谈旅行》是中国现代著名作家郁达夫的游记散文集。郁达夫在创作了诸多在文学史上极其重要的小说、散文作品之外,还留下了大量的游记性文字,他的足迹几乎走遍了祖国南北的山水、城市,乃至东南亚地区,在本书中也能看到相应的文字。这些游记作品中许多也早已成为了名作,比如《感伤的行旅》《钓台的春昼》《北平的四季》等,也都收录在《郁达夫谈旅行》一书中。郁达夫式的优雅与感伤,在这些游记作品中也表现得淋漓尽致。
  • The Lone Star Ranger

    The Lone Star Ranger

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 上清天心正法

    上清天心正法

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。