'But I want to help and soothe you,Joanna,'Emily would say.
'You are a lady,with a rich husband and fine sons!What can you want with a bereaved crone like me!'
'Joanna,I want this:I want you to come and live in my house,and not stay alone in this dismal place any longer.'
'And suppose they come and don't find me at home?You wish to separate me and mine!No,I'll stay here.I don't like you,and Ican't thank you,whatever kindness you do me!'
However,as time went on Joanna could not afford to pay the rent of the shop and house without an income.She was assured that all hope of the return of Shadrach and his sons was vain,and she reluctantly consented to accept the asylum of the Lesters'house.Here she was allotted a room of her own on the second floor,and went and came as she chose,without contact with the family.Her hair greyed and whitened,deep lines channeled her forehead,and her form grew gaunt and stooping.But she still expected the lost ones,and when she met Emily on the staircase she would say morosely:'I know why you've got me here!They'll come,and be disappointed at not finding me at home,and perhaps go away again;and then you'll be revenged for my taking Shadrach away from 'ee!'
Emily Lester bore these reproaches from the grief-stricken soul.She was sure--all the people of Havenpool were sure--that Shadrach and his sons could not return.For years the vessel had been given up as lost.
Nevertheless,when awakened at night by any noise,Joanna would rise from bed and glance at the shop opposite by the light from the flickering lamp,to make sure it was not they.
It was a damp and dark December night,six years after the departure of the brig Joanna.The wind was from the sea,and brought up a fishy mist which mopped the face like moist flannel.Joanna had prayed her usual prayer for the absent ones with more fervour and confidence than she had felt for months,and had fallen asleep about eleven.It must have been between one and two when she suddenly started up.She had certainly heard steps in the street,and the voices of Shadrach and her sons calling at the door of the grocery shop.She sprang out of bed,and,hardly knowing what clothing she dragged on herself;hastened down Emily's large and carpeted staircase,put the candle on the hall-table,unfastened the bolts and chain,and stepped into the street.The mist,blowing up the street from the Quay,hindered her seeing the shop,although it was so near;but she had crossed to it in a moment.How was it?Nobody stood there.The wretched woman walked wildly up and down with her bare feet--there was not a soul.She returned and knocked with all her might at the door which had once been her own--they might have been admitted for the night,unwilling to disturb her till the morning.
It was not till several minutes had elapsed that the young man who now kept the shop looked out of an upper window,and saw the skeleton of something human standing below half-dressed.
'Has anybody come?'asked the form.
'O,Mrs.Jolliffe,I didn't know it was you,'said the young man kindly,for he was aware how her baseless expectations moved her.
'No;nobody has come.'
June 1891.
