Nor did he omit to pique his MISTRESS a little with jealousy of her housewifery;for he said,(with a smile,)'Mrs.Abington's jelly,my dear lady,was better than yours.'
Mrs.Thrale,who frequently practised a coarse mode of flattery,by repeating his bon-mots in his hearing,told us that he had said,a certain celebrated actor was just fit to stand at the door of an auction-room with a long pole,and cry 'Pray gentlemen,walk in;'
and that a certain authour,upon hearing this,had said,that another still more celebrated actor was fit for nothing better than that,and would pick your pocket after you came out.JOHNSON.
'Nay,my dear lady,there is no wit in what our friend added;there is only abuse.You may as well say of any man that he will pick a pocket.Besides,the man who is stationed at the door does not pick people's pockets;that is done within,by the auctioneer.'
On Monday,April 10,I dined with him at General Oglethorpe's,with Mr.Langton and the Irish Dr.Campbell,whom the General had obligingly given me leave to bring with me.This learned gentleman was thus gratified with a very high intellectual feast,by not only being in company with Dr.Johnson,but with General Oglethorpe,who had been so long a celebrated name both at home and abroad.
I must,again and again,intreat of my readers not to suppose that my imperfect record of conversation contains the whole of what was said by Johnson,or other eminent persons who lived with him.What I have preserved,however,has the value of the most perfect authenticity.
He urged General Oglethorpe to give the world his Life.He said,'I know no man whose Life would be more interesting.If I were furnished with materials,I should be very glad to write it.'
Mr.Scott of Amwell's Elegies were lying in the room.Dr.Johnson observed,'They are very well;but such as twenty people might write.'Upon this I took occasion to controvert Horace's maxim,'-------mediocribus esse poetis Non Di,non homines,non concessere columnae.'
For here,(I observed,)was a very middle-rate poet,who pleased many readers,and therefore poetry of a middle sort was entitled to some esteem;nor could I see why poetry should not,like every thing else,have different gradations of excellence,and consequently of value.Johnson repeated the common remark,that,'as there is no necessity for our having poetry at all,it being merely a luxury,an instrument of pleasure,it can have no value,unless when exquisite in its kind.'I declared myself not satisfied.'Why then,Sir,(said he,)Horace and you must settle it.'He was not much in the humour of talking.
No more of his conversation for some days appears in my journal,except that when a gentleman told him he had bought a suit of lace for his lady,he said,'Well,Sir,you have done a good thing and a wise thing.''I have done a good thing,(said the gentleman,)but I do not know that I have done a wise thing.'JOHNSON.'Yes,Sir;no money is better spent than what is laid out for domestick satisfaction.A man is pleased that his wife is drest as well as other people;and a wife is pleased that she is drest.'
On Friday,April 14,being Good-Friday,I repaired to him in the morning,according to my usual custom on that day,and breakfasted with him.I observed that he fasted so very strictly,that he did not even taste bread,and took no milk with his tea;I suppose because it is a kind of animal food.
I told him that I had been informed by Mr.Orme,that many parts of the East-Indies were better mapped than the Highlands of Scotland.
JOHNSON.'That a country may be mapped,it must be travelled over.''Nay,(said I,meaning to laugh with him at one of his prejudices,)can't you say,it is not WORTH mapping?'
As we walked to St.Clement's church,and saw several shops open upon this most solemn fast-day of the Christian world,I remarked,that one disadvantage arising from the immensity of London,was,that nobody was heeded by his neighbour;there was no fear of censure for not observing Good-Friday,as it ought to be kept,and as it is kept in country-towns.He said,it was,upon the whole,very well observed even in London.He,however,owned,that London was too large;but added,'It is nonsense to say the head is too big for the body.It would be as much too big,though the body were ever so large;that is to say,though the country were ever so extensive.It has no similarity to a head connected with a body.'
Dr.Wetherell,Master of University College,Oxford,accompanied us home from church;and after he was gone,there came two other gentlemen,one of whom uttered the commonplace complaints,that by the increase of taxes,labour would be dear,other nations would undersell us,and our commerce would be ruined.JOHNSON.
(smiling,)'Never fear,Sir.Our commerce is in a very good state;and suppose we had no commerce at all,we could live very well on the produce of our own country.'I cannot omit to mention,that Inever knew any man who was less disposed to be querulous than Johnson.Whether the subject was his own situation,or the state of the publick,or the state of human nature in general,though he saw the evils,his mind was turned to resolution,and never to whining or complaint.
We went again to St.Clement's in the afternoon.He had found fault with the preacher in the morning for not choosing a text adapted to the day.The preacher in the afternoon had chosen one extremely proper:'It is finished.'
