Attacked so skilfully and resolutely, Maxley resisted little for so strong a man; but the potent poison within fought virulently: as a proof, the chloroform had to be renewed three times before it could produce any effect. At last the patient yielded to the fumes and became insensible.
Then the arched body subsided and the rigid muscles relaxed and turned supple. Sampson kneaded the man like dough by way of comment.
"It is really very extraordinary," said Osmond.
"Mai--dearr--sirr, nothing's extraornary t' a man that knows the reason of iverything."He then inquired if any one in the room had noticed at what intervals of time the pains came on.
"I am sorry to say it is continuous," said Osmond.
"Mai--dearr--sirr, nothing on airth is continuous: iverything has paroxysms and remissions--from a toothache t' a cancer."He repeated his query in various forms, till at last a little girl squeaked out, "If--_you_---please, sir, the throes do come about every ten minutes, for I was a looking at the clock; I carries father his dinner at twelve.""If you please, ma'am, there's half a guinea for you for not being such an' ijjit as the rest of the world, especially the Dockers." And he jerked her half a sovereign.
A stupor fell on the assembly. They awoke from it to examine the coin, and see if it was real, or only yellow air.
Maxley came to and gave a sigh of relief. When he had been insensible, yet out of pain, nearly eight minutes by the clock, Sampson chloroformed him again. "I'll puzzle ye, my friend strych," said he. "How will ye get your perriodical paroxysms when the man is insensible? The Dox say y' act direct on the spinal marrow. Well, there's the spinal marrow where you found it just now. Act on it again, my lad! I give ye leave--if ye can.
Ye can't; bekase ye must pass through the Brain to get there: and Ioccupy the Brain with a swifter ajint than y' are, and mean to keep y'
out of it till your power to kill evaporates, being a vigitable."With this his spirits mounted, and he indulged in a harmless and favourite fiction: he feigned the company were all males and medical students, Osmond included, and he the lecturer. "Now, jintlemen," said he, "obsairve the great Therey of the Perriodeecity and Remitteney of all disease, in conjunckshin with its practice. All diseases have paroxysms and remissions, which occur at intervals; sometimes it's a year, sometimes a day, an hour, ten minutes; but whatever th' interval, they are true to it: they keep time. Only when the disease is retirin, the remissions become longer, the paroxysms return at a greater interval, and just the revairse when the pashint is to die. This, jintlemen, is man's life from the womb to the grave: the throes that precede his birth are remittent like ivery thing else, but come at diminished intervals when he has really made up his mind to be born (his first mistake, sirs, but not his last); and the paroxysms of his mortal disease come at shorter intervals when he is really goon off the hooks: but still chronometrically; just as watches keep time whether they go fast or slow.
Now, jintlemen, isn't this a beautiful Therey?""Oh, mercy! Oh, good people help me! Oh, Jesus Christ have pity on me!"And the sufferer's body was bent like a bow, and his eyes filled with horror, and his toes pointed at his chin.
The Doctor hurled himself on the foe. "Come," said he, "smell to this, lad! That's right! He is better already, jintlemen, or he couldn't howl, ye know. Deevil a howl in um before I gave um puff chlorofm. Ah! would ye? would ye?""Oh! oh! oh! oh! ugh!----ah!"The Doctor got off the insensible body, and resumed his lecture calmly, like one who has disposed of some childish interruption. "And now to th'
application of the Therey: If the poison can reduce the tin minutes'
interval to five minutes, this pashint will die; and if I can get the tin minutes up t' half hour, this pashint will live. Any way, jintlemen, we won't detain y' unreasonably: the case shall be at an end by one o'clock."On hearing this considerate stipulation, up went three women's aprons to their eyes.
"Alack! poor James Maxley! he is at his last hour: it be just gone twelve, and a dies at one."Sampson turned on the weepers. "Who says that, y' ijjits? I said the case would end at one: a case ends when the pashint gets well or dies.""Oh, that is good news for poor Susan Maxley; her man is to be well by one o'clock, Doctor says."Sampson groaned, and gave in. he was strong, but not strong enough to make the populance suspend an opinion.
Yet, methinks it might be done: by chloroforming them.
The spasms came at longer intervals and less violent, and Maxley got so fond of the essence of Insensibility, that he asked to have some in his own hand to apply at the first warning of the horrible pains.
Sampson said, "Any fool can complete the cure; and, by way of practical comment, left him in Mr. Osmond's charge; but with an understanding that the treatment should not be varied; that no laudanum should be given;but, in due course, a stiff tumbler of brandy and water, or two. "If he gets drunk, all the better; a little intoxication weakens the body's memory of the pain it has endured, and so expedites the cure. Now off we go to th' other.""The body's memory!" said Mr. Osmond to himself: "what on earth does the quack mean?"The driver _de jure_ of the fly was not quite drunk enough to lose his horse and vehicle without missing them. He was on the look out for the robber, and as Alfred came round the corner full pelt, darted at the reins with a husky remonstrance, and Alfred cut into him with the whip:
an angry explanation--a guinea--and behold the driver sitting behind complacent and nodding.
Arrived at Albion Villa, Alfred asked Sampson submissively if he might come in and see the wife cured.
"Why, of course," said Sampson, not knowing the delicate position.
"Then ask me in before Mrs. Dodd," murmured Alfred coaxingly.
